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Topic: contagious
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Emlyn K Helicopter
VoivodFan
Member # 44
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posted February 07, 2005 18:34
    
A teacher asks her class to use the word 'contagious'. Roland the class swot, gets up and says, "Last year I got the measles and my Mum said it was contagious." "Well done, Roland" says the teacher. "Can anyone else try?" Katie, a sweet little girl with pigtails, says, "My grandma says there's a bug going round, and it's contagious." "Well done, Katie" says the teacher. "Anyone else?" Little Irish Shaun jumps up and says in a broad Irish voice, "Our next door neighbour is painting his house with a two-inch Brush and my Dad says it will take the contagious." -------------------- Der der der-der DER! Der der der-der DER! DER!
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Head Villain
VoivodFan
Member # 524
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posted February 09, 2005 11:32
hahahahhaa!A teacher asks her class to use the word 'fascinate'. Roland the class swot, gets up and says, "I went to the science museum last week, it was fascinating." "Well done, Roland" says the teacher. "But I said to use the word Fascinate. Can anyone else try?" Katie, a sweet little girl with pigtails, says, "My mum read me a Harry Potter book last night, I was fascinated." "Well done, Katie" says the teacher. "But still not the right word. Anyone else?" Little Irish Shaun jumps up and says in a broad Irish voice, "My mam's got a blouse with ten buttons on it. But her titties be so huge, she can only fascinate." -------------------- String em up
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ShredTilDead
VoivodFan
Member # 392
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posted February 10, 2005 00:14
A teacher prepares a plate with different kinds of meat on it, and takes it to her first-grade class. As part of "Learning About Food" day, she passes the plate around, has students take a bite of various kinds of meat, and discuss what each meat is, based upon texture, color, smell, etc.Mary picked a piece of chicken, smelled it, tasted it, and said "This is chicken." "Very good, Mary!" said the teacher. Billy picked a piece of roast beef, smelled it, tasted it, and said "This is beef." "Very good, Billy!" said the teacher. Lucy picked a piece of pork, smelled it, tasted it, and said "This is pork." "Very good, Lucy!" said the teacher. Johnny picked up a piece of venison, smelled it, tasted it, and said "I don't know what kind of meat this is; I've never tasted anything like this before." "Well, I can give you a hint...it's what your mother calls your dad when he comes into the house at the end of the day." In the back of the room, Timmy yelled "Spit it out Johnny, spit it out! It's asshole!" -------------------- My head explodes, my ears ring, I can't remember just where I've been.
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posted February 08, 2005 08:51
