Voivod Faked!!

Canada's premiere 'Psychotropic Avuncular Mental Warriors' Voivod have been
found to be at the centre of band-faking scandal.
Originally thought to been founded in Quebec, by the four founding members of the band, they have maintained a loyal and vociferous following throughout the world, originally put down to inconoclastic brilliance of the music.
This, however, turns out to be a load of old kak.
Photographic evidence has proved the band to be nothing more than 4 crudely
decorated sock puppets. The man responsible, Stanley Crimson, was eventually caught on film in his Tipton, West Midlands home filming what is puported to be the bands latest video on a stolen 8mm camera with
several tramps playing the role of alien 'Greys'.
After claiming that he had released 12 albums and countless singles mistakenly, he eventually confessed to having conjured up the entire career of the band "because he was bored of what was on telly."
"It was difficult," he admitted "once I'd started and released 'War and Pain', it became really popular. I never expected that - I thought it was rubbish!
I like Leo Sayer and northern soul myself, oh and Carcass, they're allright, I guess."
"You'd never guess how hard it is to manipulate four sock puppets on stage or in a press conference." I point out that I would find it difficult to believe. "Well, I hoodwinked everyone with it for long enough! I got with more than that too; the supposed classic "Nothingface" was nothing more than an old Iron Maiden album, re-recorded faster and with the addition of me pushing a drumkit down a stairwell.
That 'famous' clinical sound is because I mastered it in a shed." He adds.
"The thing is, I have now genuinely tricked Jason Newstead into recording with 3 sock puppets - in his house. I'm not sure if I can get away with that one..."
At this, I remind him of Metallica.
"You're probably right, I suppose. I'll get another five or six albums out of him."
Asked if he has a favourite member he eventually responds, "After all this time I suppose it would have to be Blacky, this one here" He is holding up a tatty black sock, with woolly hair and a missing eye. "I made up the story that he left the band when my dog chewed a hole in his face."
Asked why he didn't just use a different sock he responds "I never thought of that."

quote:

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Originally posted by h:
So the rumours that Blacky really quit Voivod to star in 'Ed the sock' are true?!!

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Suprisingly he ended up going solo and apparantly released several albums under a different pseudonym, and with a patch over the chew hole.
Or something.

Was there a point to this, or do we have on our hands some stir-crazy, Multiverse-Jonesing Voivod fans feeling the need to litter the boards with misfired attempts at irreverent, quasi-humourous, absurdist quips?

quote:

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Originally posted by Tangento:
That was the single most inane, useless assortment of words and phrases I have ever had the misfortune to suffer through.

Was there a point to this, or do we have on our hands some stir-crazy, Multiverse-Jonesing Voivod fans feeling the need to litter the boards with misfired attempts at irreverent, quasi-humourous, absurdist quips?

I am gonna go start a new hockey thread or something.

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A hockey thread would be lovely, I'm sure.
Apparantly this whole thread has been faked,
including this response.

It may have to do with the fact that I am today beginning my 9th straight week of "Lay-Off", and the holidays are coming down hard around here.

Oh damn it!
This counts doesn't it!

Here's a proof :

After he left the band , Snake tried to assassinate Canada's Prime Minister ( for reasons that we still don't know ) . Unfortunately , Snake got stopped by 2 retired RCMP's before he could do anything .

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Jean-Yves Thériault thinks of a new career in tele-evangelism !

At the last Jimmy Swaggart's event in Montreal , Jean-Yves Thériault has been seen in the crowd , hypnotized by Mr. Swaggart's words of wisdom and love while learning every aspect of the job of a tele-evangelist . We wish him good luck and lots of bucks . Don't forget , you read it first in Echo-Vedette , le journal des vedettes au Québec !

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