VoivodFan : Worst X-Mas Present Ever?

my profile | register | search | faq | forum home

»	VoivodFan » Cosmic Drama » Worst X-Mas Present Ever?

UBBFriend: Email this page to someone!

Author

Topic: Worst X-Mas Present Ever?

Skul
VoivodFan
Member # 19

posted December 08, 2002 22:32

I know it might sound moronic (then lookin' at the other topics...) but what was the most idiotic/useless xmas present you ever got? (and no, i'm not being original.. i saw that on Something Awful a couple weeks back)

Me... a fuckin' Dustbuster (those little vaccuum cleaners) from my dad like 8 years ago.. What the fuck?

| IP: Logged

h
VoivodFan
Member # 8

posted December 09, 2002 04:57

I work for a t-shirt distribution company. It's amazing how many relatives seem to forget this and give me t-shirts for xmas. Like I don't have enough all ready!

| IP: Logged

Väinämöinen
VoivodFan
Member # 27

posted December 09, 2002 08:05

quote:
Originally posted by hexonxonx:
hehe i never ever got any present for xmas... we never celebrated it, only new year. and i can't remember any useless ny present, maybe im lucky.

What about that Frost Man (or whatever the English equivalent is ) celebration in Russia? Doesn't that take place in December? I may be totally astray, but didn't people give each other presents each year that day during the days of the mighty USSR?

Ok, back to the topic. My parents still buy me a Garfield calendar every year! I got my first one when I was like twelve or so. Now I'm married, have two kids and nearing my 30th b-day, and I'll probably still get a new one this Christmas. Ah well, my 4-year-old will love it for sure.

| IP: Logged

K
VoivodFan
Member # 6

posted December 09, 2002 08:20

I dont do the Xmiss thing either.

Hail Satan!

| IP: Logged

Emlyn K Helicopter
VoivodFan
Member # 44

posted December 09, 2002 09:02

A waistcoat (no buttons) in black with silver stars all over the front. Thanks Grandma.

My Dad got me two BOSS pedal boards, the empty three-to-a-case things. I only had one BOSS pedal to put in them.

Some sort of Ninja gerbal that sings 'Kung Fu Fighting' and spins a nunchuku. Mother-in-law, that one.

Humourous remote controlled 'fart' box. Mother-in-law again.

Large plastic hollow cast of 'cute' frog, approx 15" high, purpose unknown. Again, Mother-in-law.

Why can't they just club together and buy me a fucking Strat?

| IP: Logged

Spawn_of_SATAN_666
VoivodFan
Member # 62

posted December 09, 2002 09:58

first of all king kula does to celebrate
x-mass he just wants to look tough in front of all us metal heads.
The worst thing I got for x-mass is when my
ex-husband bought me clothes with out me, bad idea boys don't do that. buy your women something thats useful like a vibrator so she can be happy

| IP: Logged

nia
VoivodFan
Member # 9

posted December 09, 2002 11:18

Hey, I could use a dustbuster. And I'd like that Travolta/Kotter doll too. Just goes to show that one man's trash is a Noitall's treasure. On the other hand, my mother is insane and likes to give me things like Delft china. Now, I like entertaining as much as the next person but serving plates with windmills on them has never been my style.

| IP: Logged

Väinämöinen
VoivodFan
Member # 27

posted December 10, 2002 06:10

quote:
Originally posted by hexonxonx:
Grandfather Frost was a character replacing Santa Claus for New Year celebration. Angel was replaced by Snow Maid - kids were told that she's GF's granddaughter. And they brought presents and stuff. You know they come from Finland?

They do? Maybe I should read some more of our history

...Thanks for the explanation.

quote:
...But it was not Gr. Frost who brought presents back then, he was GIVEN presents. And "Snow Maid" was one of them - a human sacrifice really, a girl was taken out in the cold naked to be frozen to death. Nice kids holiday you know.

*brrr* Suddenly it feels so cold in here...that's very interesting stuff. Do you know how they chose which girl to sacrifice? Were there any rituals or did they just ditch her somewhere and get back home for a warm cup of cocoa?

| IP: Logged

Nuclear Vampire
VoivodFan
Member # 20

posted December 10, 2002 10:43

My Uncle gave me his old softball glove when I was 9 or so. Notice I said "softball" and not "baseball" and that he didn't get me a new one, but gave me his ratty old piece of shit. He tried to explain his gift later at dinner. He got all nostalgic and said shit like "When I used to play blah blah blah...".
Fucking crap. I had bought myself a new, kick ass baseball glove the previous summer so wtf did I need with this smelly old relic? Fucking tosser. I never liked him anyway, and recently found out my Dad hates him too! He played nice all these years and I had no idea! He's a better actor than me!

My Aunt (his wife) bought me K-Tel's "Full Tilt" one year. I think I was 12 or 13. If I remember correctly (the site http://www.ktelclassics.com/ has the wrong track listing) it had garbage like Diana Ross and Kenny Loggins and some cool tunes like Drugs In My Pocket and Atomic. I think it's still at my parents house. Still, for a kid who listened to Judas Priest and Iron Maiden, it was a terrible gift.

| IP: Logged

Väinämöinen
VoivodFan
Member # 27

posted December 11, 2002 06:43

quote:
Originally posted by hexonxonx:
Väinämöinen:
Everyone knows that Santa comes from Lappland is it in Finland or where? So does G.Frost with his "gr-daughter".

At least everyone in Finland knows he lives in Korvatunturi, near the Russian border just above the Arctic Circle. Maybe G.Frost (sounds like some Norwegian black metal drummer with just the 'G' in front :lol: ) is the satanic half-brother of Santa Claus who couldn't bear the over-happy life in the Finnish Lapland and took refuge in Siberia, enslaving the local people and demanding young virgins to satiate his demand for fresh blood...Anyway, most non-Europeans seem to think Santa lives in the North Pole, and Swedes, those blasphemous bastards, even dare to claim he resides in Sweden! (wink, wink,

)

PS. Lapland spreads over the northern parts of Norway, Sweden, Finland and Russia. Here's some info:
Lapland
And here's some more about the indigenous people:
Magick of the Shamans
This is quite heavy reading due the age of the inscript, but it's funny nevertheless.

| IP: Logged

Marginal
VoivodFan
Member # 116

posted December 11, 2002 12:59

0.10$ and an orange ..... J/k The worst gift i had was this creepy and too small E.T. yellow pajama when i was like 6 ... 20 years later , it's still on my mind ...

* calls for professional help *

P.s. A John Travolta action figure ? man ...

* gives warcorpse's address to his psychiatrist *

| IP: Logged

All times are ET